Half-baked Adaptation:Coming Soon to a Theatre Near You

Hello,its been a long time since I made an original metal-unrelated post like this...oh,wait.No.OK,then its a long time since I made a post on cinema.And thanks to this current slurry of movies that are adapted from popular literature or recreation,my topic is quite relevant.


I recently saw Transformers 2:Revenge of the Fallen.I loved it.Yes,Megan Fox was in the movie and there were times I felt helpless about not being able to do anything to her...but,the special effects and animation work created magic with the Autobots v/s Decepticons battles themselves.From my wandering on the net,I have not yet come across very serious backlash against the accuracy of the story to this movie franchise (as I know nothing about it myself).Yet,a movie that recently (and after much delay) released in India before this one was the eagerly-awaited X-Men Origins:Wolverine.I was waiting for the day this movie would release and had extremely high hopes from it.Especially when I learned that among others,Deadpool is a featured character.I was raring to see the red uniformed sword master with a big mouth at his best,killing mutants for money:

What I got instead was a semi-mummified,naked-chested freak that was indestructible and was basically William Stryker's new toy.Far from the real Deadpool story (a mercenary who gets cancer and after ending up as a failed Weapon X program,gains healing abilities beyond Wolverine's).And this is just a small part of the bigger lamentation:the story itself.Wolverine is NOT Sabertooth's brother (rather,Sabertooth is Wolverine's gardener's son),he works at a lumberjack outpost immediately after escaping his home as opposed to the movie portrayal,he ALMOST kills his 1st Weapon X captor (which happens right after World War II) and many other such grievances.

Which brings me to my point:cinematic adaptations are almost completely exclusive of the real story.Directors these days just bank on a star actor portraying a character to gather the cash.Cases in point:Hugh Jackman as Wolverine,Sienna Miller as Baroness (for the upcoming G.I.Joe),Tom Hanks as Professor Robert Langdon etc.Yes,they all have a certain level of excitement in them,but when will they start doing justice to the real story?

And what about TOTAL bastardization of a franchise like Eragon?Where the hell do I begin with this complete waste of 70 mm reel?The fact that a DRAGON was given feathers?Or Arya's sexy brunette imagined image was urinated upon?Or the Urgals looking like fired sumo wrestlers and NOTHING like a sleeker version of the Minotaur?Or the fact that the WHOLE story was so badly mangled (removal of the Hadarac desert scene,no breaking of the Isidar Mithrim,no Solembum and not even the mention of Murtagh's Zar'roc wound) that by the time one reached the end,the only thing he can do is lament.

Other popular movie adaptations like the Harry Potter,The Lord of the Rings and Spiderman series are less infuriating with the inaccuracy (though I hate Sam Raimi for killing Venom off).But on a whole,I have learned that if I should watch an adaptation,I should just unlearn anything I know about the original story.

Indian schools: The mechanization begins here

Parents have always been proud of seeing their children in some sort of uniform.Whether its the 1st school uniform,an Army uniform or that of a doctor, the 'photo in the uniform' is mandatory.I'm not too fond of uniforms myself,but they're acceptable to the point of giving a certain identity in society to the wearer.But Indians have somehow misused that concept of identity in a VERY personal manner.Let me explain:

The school that I have passed out of has officially gone to hell. The principal stepped down, we now have one incompetent asshole as an acting principal (this guy's ONLY claim to fame in school is 100% attendance.Oh and emptying whole bottles of perfume on himself before he comes to school),all the good,well-established teachers are leaving only to be replaced by educationists who can at best be described as 'graduates' and basically the remaining ones are trying to hold this school together with a very loose grip of disciplinary extremity. For example: no guitar performances or western dance performances are allowed as that 'westernizes' the school.No dancing on songs with words like 'love' and 'dil':we don't want to 'corrupt' these clean minds.Anyone wearing a dangling earring,a nose piercing,sporting hair longer than a certain length,wearing PT uniform on a non-PT day AND carrying MP3 players or CDs is IMMEDIATELY scrutinized and sent to the principal,who is a fucked about discipline himself.Moreover,even PICNICS have to be attended in uniform.

All this,JUST because you are in a school and you carry the 'values' and 'morals' taught in the school out into the real world.The only problem is that if you do that,the real world will pull you down and enslave you for life.I'll tell you the REAL reason behind all this: pressure from society.Every school administrator wants to be top school.And since discipline is sadly the main reson for judging that prestigiously worthless position,discipline enforcement seems to be the only way.Every school needs money.Not money to be able to continue because I'm sure they get enough of that through contacts.No...they want money to show their position in society.They want to be the alpha male of the pride.Or the matriarch of the herd.They want to have the 'best' students.The most controllable and conformistic idiots.Ones who will listen to ALL they say.

Damn.So this is where education is going in India.This is not education.Its subjugation.Its a loss of identity.Its a 'mass hypnosis',as Sepultura put it.And it must end.And the only way that will happen is mutiny.Students need to start throwing it back into the faces of the teachers.Silence is not the solution.Make them realize how idiotic they are behaving.Formality must come to an end.Don't worry about the consequences.NUMBERS are all that count.This is THE only way to ensure India progresses.